Roadtrip fun.

I'd rather not know what this means. Really.

Caption, anyone?

Attn: Coyotes; Subj: Free Food

Finally broke down and decided to post a barn cat photo.



Of course this means I'm attached. Which means they'll promptly disappear and become between-meal snacks for the local coyote population.

Plankton my ass.

1. Massive sunburn acquired the other day. I'm not just burnt; I'm purple. Skin cancer, here I come!

You'd think being part Native American would give me some melanin, but alas, the Danish blood in me seems to be in charge of my complexion.

2. I don't care if it only eats plankton. It still looks fucking scary.

We hang funny balls from our trees 'round these parts.

Huge rain/hail/wind storm a few days ago. Lasted all of 30 minutes, but managed to do this:



And yes, I said hail. In the summer. In Missouri. That place everyone at Brown thought was in the South.

And for reference, that shed behind the tree is large enough for several horses to fit under.

The Story of Your Glands

1. I learned yesterday that I had a great-great-uncle (or something) whose first name was Lum. Huh?

Several other relatives shipped mules to Mussolini during WWII. They fed and cleaned up after them in exchange for free passage to Italy; apparently, politics didn't even enter into the decision. They just wanted to party in Rome. Taking the latter in good faith, I am immensely amused.

2. Packing update: Found a notebook from high school with entries for each college I was considering, with carefully notated columns listing pros, cons, and other miscellanea that might affect the decision-making process. Surprisingly, Brown was a little light on the pros. Glad I ignored the list and went anyway.

Also found a book entitled "The Story of Your Glands." I'm tempted to keep it.

3. Word Of The Day.

4. Dirtiest (John Donne) Poem Ever.

MENnonites

1. Visited some Old Order Mennonites yesterday. They shun cars and electricity, the boys tend to have stupid haircuts, they speak their own dialect of German, and most families have eight to twelve children. I think I've found the community of my dreams.

2. Packing update: no way I'm fitting all this shit in my car. The books and stuffed animals alone would fill it to capacity.

3. In honor of my recent search for Health Insurance after college, I give you Gore Vidal, from Perpetual War for Perpetual Peace:

It is ironic -- to use the limpest adjective -- that a government as spontaneously tyrannous and callous as ours should, over the years, have come to care so much about our health as it endlessly tests and retests commercial drugs available in other lands while arresting those who take "hard" drugs on the parental ground that the;y are bad for the user's health. One is touched by their concern -- touched and dubious. After all, these same compassionate guardians of our well-being have sternly, year in and year out, refused to allow us to have what every other First World country simply takes for granted, a national health service.

4. Once again, The Onion has me pegged:

Aquarius: (Jan. 20—Feb. 18)
While it's true that a certain software giant stole its graphic user interface from a smaller computer company, it stole its tendency to get locked up repeatedly from you.

5. The other day Dad gave me these words of wisdom re: riding horses:

"Do you realize what a huge advantage you have as a rider in not having testicles?"

Indeed.

Manual Labor

1. Got paid approximately $50/hour to mow the front yard and along the driveway. Not bad. Though I'm sure I look like the Supreme Dork of the Universe when I'm mowing. Complete with visor, sound-proof headphones, and cargo vest. Not to mention singing along to my walkman who-knows-how-loud since I can't hear anything over the mower or through the headphones.

2. Scary.

3. Why oh why didn't this happen *before* I left?

4. Unpacking update: sorry, no amusing lists as of yet. My only comment: I own entirely too much stuff.

Mead as Evil Influence?

1. Very, very sad.

2. Penn's daughter was apparently born today. Her name: Moxie Crimefighter Jillette. Let's hope she's one badass girl so she can live up to that name.

3. Took the baby horse for a walk today. It's good to be home.

Party @ Tha Dumpster

1. The Commencement program mis-capitalized my last name. Typical.

2. Mom and I stayed in a motel just west of St. Louis last night. When we pulled into the parking lot, there was a group of eight or nine construction workers having a barbeque near the dumpster.

3. The sight of a Brown Morning Mail in my inbox brought on a mild sense of nostalgia. It's too soon for this.

4. Unpacking and sorting begins tomorrow. Amusing lists forthcoming.